Psychotherapy and Counselling
Whatever brings you to therapy you are making a choice to share your situation with another person, or persons. Although you might feel like you can’t cope, or that you’ve got things wrong etc. – I think you’re basically okay.
I work in a present-centred way, practicing from a faith that we are enough, and how we are is okay - even if we don’t always feel it.
In my own therapy I have found that as I’ve broadened my awareness, my tendency to experience my problems as “about me” has diminished.
Therapy is not about making our problems go away. However becoming aware that the problem is not exclusively ours can be liberating. The next step is to figure out which parts of a problem we have capacity to change.
If you are thinking about making this choice I would say to you that therapy takes commitment and it takes work. But I would also wish to convey the many experiences of profound beauty, love, awe, and laughter that I have encountered both as a therapist and as a client over the years. I am often humbled by what is possible in individual therapy and group situations.
How I work
A lot of therapy is the tension between wanting someone else to solve our problems for us, and knowing that obviously they can’t.
Only we have the solutions, and yet we come to therapy because we don’t have the solutions. The reason I believe we cannot deal with some of our problems on our own, is that our problems were created in relationships – they can only be solved in a relationship. In a sense it is one’s capacity for relationship that suffers. And this is what we can work on.
Much of therapy is exploring what happens in the client/therapist relationship as a means of shedding light on our deeper patterns. I think of therapy as a relational lab, where we come to new awarenesses through giving attention to what happens.
I might ask you to try new things, to break old patterns, to get new information.
I might invite you to refine your experience, to go more deeply into your experience.
I will often share what’s going on for me as a way of broadening out the total situation by including what’s happening on my side of the relationship.
We will see what happens.
So therapy is enlivening and creative.
“Nobody said life is meant to be easy - right?”